What is it, you ask?

It’s one of my personal favorites. It’s apologizing, but not really. In fact, it’s apologizing for someone else instead of for your own ridiculous behavior.

“I’m sorry you feel that way.” (About my inability to hold a passing interest in our discussion)

“I’m sorry that things just didn’t work out.” (…with our relationship, because I cheated on you)

“It stinks that I didn’t make it.” (…and instead was late, missing the movie)

None of these are apologies. So why do we go about pretending that they are? Is it a lack of responsibility? Plain old procrastination? A recent article on CNN.com approached the Back-handed Apology, and spoke with our own Nick Smith.

Michelle Goodman

Don’t play the blame game and offer a back-handed apology, says one expert.

David Bohl is no stranger to apologies — the good, the bad and the insincere.

A former Chicago securities trader and a recovering alcoholic, the 47-year-old Hartland, Wisconsin, resident spent two decades of his marriage stringing together empty promises and hollow apologies. First, because he was a workaholic, and later, because of his drinking.

Read the rest of this entry »

A great summary of some of my best argumentative skills.

Nick Smith wants a better dialogue than this. 

Flash Fiction reviews I Was Wrong, and gets right at the issues at hand.

Alfred Kinsey’s work elevated the conversation about sex. Timothy Leary’s work elevated the conversation about drugs. Now, the philosopher Nick Smith gives us his thorough study of apologies, a work that promises to elevate the conversation about what it means to say “I’m sorry.”

I Was Wrong: The Meanings of Apologies exposes how contemporary gestures of contrition demand our critical attention. Smith, who teaches Philosophy at the University of New Hampshire, examines the significance of various forms of regret. From collective apologies for the holocaust to a pet owner’s apology for forgetting to fill his dog’s bowl, all remorse receives scrutiny. Smith writes with the learning and patience of a benevolent professor. His message persuades a reader that today’s public and private apologies are playing fast and loose with morality. 

Read the rest of the article at Flash Fiction >>

What a busy week indeed. Our authors are giving some valuable commentary on issues from all over the news.

The allegations of polygamy and abuse by the FLDS in Eldorado, TX has thrust issues of child abuse and church-state relations into the spotlight. Marci Hamilton wrote about the FDLS two years ago in God vs. the Gavel, and addresses bringing child abusers to justice in Justice Denied. Look no further for expert legal commentary on the unfolding investigation, including her regular posts right here on this blog.

Here are just a few of her many appearances over the last few days:

Interview on Good Morning America on April 10, see minute 2:50

Live chat on washingtonpost.com on April 8

Interview on the BBC World Service, April 10, 10pm

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A video recently surfaced in which Canadian MP Tom Lukiwski says some pretty awful things about homosexuals. He offered a very public apology and asked for forgiveness. But who would be capable of doing so? Charles Griswold, author of Forgiveness comments on the possibility in The National Post.

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Speaking of apologies, they’re everywhere, aren’t they? Between Spitzer, all of the presidential candidates, and Lukiwski above, Nick Smith, author of I Was Wrong has his work cut out for him. He had an hour-long interview on New Hampshire Public Radio’s The Exchange Tuesday. Have a listen!

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Scientists and politicians are at odds as never before. Sheila Jasanoff discusses the many facets of scientific research, its intersection with government, and the ways that they can better get along in her review of Roger Pielke Jr.’s The Honest Broker.

Our authors include experts on just about everything. Here are a few snips and links from around the web. Are there more we haven’t caught? Send them our way: cupblog [dot] us [at] gmail [dot] com.

Nat Hentoff of the Village Voice cites Colin Shindler, author of A History of Modern Israel in his latest article on Israel

Fueling Our Future: An Introduction to Sustainable Energy is shortlisted for a Donner Prize. The winner will be announced April 16.

Does Nick Smith’s I Was Wrong pass the “Page 99 Test”? Find out here. Smith was also reviewed on Read the Spirit, a book blog worth a visit for faith-based reviews.

Barry Friedburg, author of Anesthesia in Cosmetic Surgery discusses yet another preventable death.

Ever wondered what it’s like to be interviewed on the radio or television?

It’s been a busy couple of weeks for Nick Smith, author of I Was Wrong: the Meanings of Apologies. Here are some of his thoughts on dropping everything for media appearances, his own radio idol, and being accused of having a speech impediment.

Jonathan Gaugler, my hard-working publicist at Cambridge, asked my to write up some thoughts about the flurry of activity since the release of I Was Wrong: The Meanings of Apologies. This is my first book, so this is all new to me.

Diane Rehm devoted an entire show to the book on Tuesday. This may not sell as many copies as an appearance on Oprah, but for me it was even more thrilling. Diane Rehm belongs in the pantheon of great figures in contemporary media, and I don’t know of any better interviewer (although Terry Gross surely warrants similar praise). As so many programs become increasingly argumentative and paced for short attention spans, she slows down conversations and treats her guests with such grace and thoughtfulness. She listens enthusiastically, which I find to be one of the most important skills for any teacher. Over the years I have looked to her show as a model for conversations in my classrooms, so this was like meeting the master. Read the rest of this entry »